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Tuesday, December 7, 2010


The Right Man
A short story by Jonny Fantastico



The three knocks on the door jarred me out of my current state of mind. I didn’t even know how long I had been staring at my own reflection.

“Come in”; I called out; my voice full of emotion.
“Hey, handsome”; came the sweet voice of my mother. “Just wanted to check up on you”; she continued as she closed the door behind her.

I glanced at her and smiled lightly, before returning to the comfort of the person in the mirror; dressed in a crisp, black suit and white dress shirt; top button undone.

“Is everything alright”; she asked me; slowly making her way to where I stood.

“Um… yeah”; I said with forced enthusiasm. “Of course it is.”

“You were never the best liar”; she replied with a smile in her voice. “Talk to me.”

I sighed and reached for the tie on the dresser next to me. 

“Let me do that”; she spoke; gently taking the tie from my hands and wrapping it around my collar from behind me. I caught a glance of how beautiful she looked; even at this age. With the same smile I heard in her voice and could now see; she nodded for me to answer her.

“I don’t know”; I said. “I think I’m just a little scared.”

“Of course you would be”; she said, walking around in front of me to continue her work on my ensemble. “It’s a big day for you and Scott.”

“I know that”; I responded; almost matter-of-factly. “And I’m so happy. And he makes me so happy, I just…”

“You don’t know if you’re going to make him as happy”; she finished for me.

“Yeah”; I answered; suddenly with tears in my eyes. “He’s amazing, Mom. He has done so much for me; continues to do so much for me. I almost lost him once…”

“I remember that”; she said. “But that was the fault of you both; not just you. You were both scared and had so much pain in your lives. But, you found your way back to each other. And look at where you both are now.”

“You’re right”; I admitted; wiping away tears as they fell. “I still can’t believe he forgave me for the pain I caused him, Mom. I was so horrible…”

“Hey”; she said, lifting my chin, meeting her eyes with mine. “That’s in the past. And you both caused each other hurt and pain. But you’ve healed from that and moved forward. Don’t dwell on that. He loves you more now even then he did back then and you and I both know that.”

With the first honest smile I had in hours; I nodded. “Mom?”

“Yes, sweetie”; she said without a blink; still checking to make sure I looked perfect.

“Did it hurt you when I came out?”

She paused for only a second, but it was noticeable. “It didn’t hurt me; but it did throw me for a spin. It was hard to take in.”

“It was harder to get out”; I said with a light laugh.

“I’m sure it was”; she said with a laugh of her own. “But, no; you didn’t hurt me. I guess I was scared myself. Not because of the stereotypes or anything like that. We’ve spoken about safe sex, you know your left from your right. I guess… well, life can be so lonely and it seems that being gay can sometimes hold so much more of that. I didn’t want that for you.”

“I understand what you mean. For a long while, I thought I was destined to be alone. I had boyfriends and they hurt me so bad.”

“I remember some of them”; she spoke; wiping off the light dust from my lapel. “But they pale in comparison to how Scott is. He’s a great man; son. He loves you so much and treats you like gold. Heck; if he was straight and I was a few years younger…”

“Mom!”

She laughed a bit louder and I joined her. I couldn’t remember the last time we had spoken like this.

“Of course I’m kidding, honey. I’ve never seen a love like you and his before. You’ve both been through hell and back together and you’ve always come out of everything stronger and closer. You’ve picked a great person, baby. I am so proud of you.”

I looked at my mother with a light I had never seen before. She may have been proud of me; but I had never felt more grateful to have her as my mom.

“You know he loves you, too.”

“I’m well aware of that. Although, I’m not sure what he loves more; me or my cooking.”

I gave her a look and she laughed once again; her happy emotions filling the room and myself.

“I’m just keeping things light. And I’ve grown to love him as well. He’s been through a lot in his life. I just feel a bit bad at times.”

“Why, Mom?”

“I know he lost his mom”; she said, sadness lightly tinged in her voice. “I don’t want him to think I’m trying to replace her in any way. I would never want to do that.”

“He knows you aren’t. He respects the fact that you care for him as much as you do and he knows that you would never try to take her place. That’s not what you’re about. You know how a mother’s love is: it’s for all children, not just their own.”

She glanced up at me and gave me a questioning look of her own.

“What is it? Do I have something in my teeth?”

“No. It’s just… I’m wondering how I missed the part where my baby grew up into a man.”

I looked at her again and smiled; bringing her into a hug. There was nothing more to be said. 

“What’s taking you two so long”; came a voice from the door.

“Alyssa”; I said with a smile, pulling from my mom’s embrace. “Shouldn’t you be with your brother right now?”

“I’ve already checked up on him; bro-in-law. He’s oddly calm; so I decided to see if you were the bundle of nerves.”

“He was”; Mom said to her, “but I’ve handled that already.” She stepped away from in front of me and I took another glance in the mirror. It seemed with her touches, I went from looking decent to downright beautiful.

“You’re welcome”; my mother said without provocation. I looked at her again and smiled.

“So, are we ready”; Alyssa asked; her light-blue dress flowing behind her. 

“I’ve never been more ready”; I responded. 

“Let’s go”; she said; taking my mother’s hand and leading her out the room. “See you on the other side of the altar.”

“Wait”; I said suddenly and they both looked back to me. “You spoke to him too, didn’t you”; I asked my mother with an all-knowing smile.

“Of course”; she answered. “I had to make sure both of my sons were happy.” With that, she continued her way out of the room; still arm in arm with my future sister-in-law.

As they left, I looked into the mirror one more time. It was time to become one with my beloved.

*****

The sun shined brightly; not a cloud in the beautiful sky. I looked toward Scott; looking just as beautiful as I always thought he was, if not more so. I slowly made my way down the grass; passing his friends and family on one side; my own on the other.

“Now, I’m standing at four corners/to have and to hold”; came the song from the speakers surrounding the garden. “Now my love, you stand beside me/to walk life’s winding road…”

I continued down the aisle; Scott’s eyes never leaving my own. I made my way past the people in attendance, trying not to miss a moment of this beauty. This was what I was waiting for… to be his and his alone.

I continued walking and felt a hand quickly clutch mine. I looked down and saw my mother’s hand holding my own… and slowly letting go. She had given me away. With a smile, I mouthed, “I love you, Mom.”

She nodded in response and in the same fashion mouthed, “I love you, too.”

I looked back up toward Scott, his arm outstretched for my own.

“And I owe it all to you/For taking the chance/You’ve shown me there’s a right man/’Cause I never knew a right man…”

Finally reaching the end of the aisle, I took his hand in mine and gave him the biggest smile I ever emoted in my life. 

“I love you”; he said quietly; tears filling his eyes as well.

“I love you more”; I responded; clutching his hand for that moment and for all time. Life had led me to him and there was no stopping our love.

I finally found the right man…


The End

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